Thursday, June 01, 2017

Repeat repeat...

Still here. Still in every kind of waiting.

Tenure? waiting.
Talking? waiting.
Summer weather? waiting.
This wart on my foot? waiting again (with occasional wailing)
Figuring out what we're going to do for Katie's school next year since she graduates this week? waiting.
Trying to find a 3rd car? waiting.

The last two years have felt like 100 repeats of the same frustrating, semi-decent-but-almost-better week over and over and over. Every single week I think: "I'm sure at least some of this will be resolved within a week or two..." And yet, here we are. 2.5 years home. Two years since I submitted for tenure. Waiting, waiting, waiting, delaying any actual confrontations or decisions, hoping for some kind of (positive) resolution.

And so it's hard to see the little progress steps that we do make.  Maryna turned 19 this week. She had prom 2 weeks ago. She got a job nearly 2 months ago. Katie sang a beautiful solo at her concert about two weeks ago (Francesca Batastelli's "He knows my name").  She's in Canada for a French immersion trip with her class this week. August is crazy brilliant at math. He never stops talking. Jorge has grown so much and no longer drives me completely bonkers with his decision making every hour of the day (maybe a few days a week, but infinite improvement). He's actually so patient and helpful and forward-thinking now that I sometimes feel like I don't even know this boy. I'm excited to get to know him.

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