The Shoe Standoff held for a solid week. Literally one week later almost to the minute (and just 24 hours before our flight) we had communication. I had pre-emptively purchased several pair online so we ran upstairs and tried them on. Success. Now 4 pair will be mailed back with free returns later this week.
Also? A form to join the volleyball team was requested and brought home and is sitting on our counter. JOINING. THE. VOLLEYBALL. TEAM.
I don't do sports, but I'll be sportsing in the sports seating with the sportiest of sportsing gear and shouting out some sportsing words. Huzzah!