Sunday, August 18, 2013

Every morning

Dear Other Trains,

You'll be pleased to know I laid on my horn for a solid minute whilst rolling through the city at the slowest allowable speed.  No residents with windows open are still asleep.  Our work here is done.

The 5:01 AM Train

Dear 5:01 AM Train,

I had greatly anticipated my opportunity to wake all residents, so I took it anyhow.  Twelve long blasts of the horn should assure that no children anywhere in the area are still asleep.

The 5:34 AM Train

Dear Other Trains,

You early trains are always so greedy.  Leave some for the rest of us.  I'm always left with honking twice as long for the sole payoff of re-waking the babies and setting the dogs on edge.  Just once I'd like to wake the grownups, but they're always already awake and miserable.

Bite me,
The 6:11 AM Train
(on behalf of all Pre-8AM Trains)

Dear All Trains,

Amateurs.    I love you anyhow.

Your fan,
August (aka The 6:14 AM Train)


  1. You. Are. Hilarious!

    Jennifer M.

  2. You crazy, funny, lady. This is my favorite post since the pronunciation mishap. Lands, when was that? I want to read that again...