Monday, November 12, 2012

Tagged

Jill tagged me for a meme a few years ago.  I started it and got side-tracked and just found it back in my drafts.  Here goes.

Rules: List 7 things that are interesting about you. Then tag your fellow friends and bloggers to do the same.

I'll go ahead and make this "7 things that are really inexplicable and probably indicate a need for medication." Because those are more fun.

1. I get irrationally annoyed at staircases that wind in such a way that you make left turns going down and right turns going up. These are backwards stairs and it's just plain wrong. Don't expect me to go up or down them without becoming subtly irritated. In our house you can go either way on the stairs (two bottom sections, one top). I almost exclusively use the "correct" side even though it's the less pretty side.

2. Fork tines. Oh. my. lands. If they are not perfectly aligned I have to switch forks with Rob or request a new one. An entire meal can be ruined by an askew fork tine. Rob knows this all too well and will just reach over and trade me forks if I so much as glance at my fork funny after the first bite. God love that man.

3. When eating chips or crackers or any other small snack I have to take an even number of items and split them evenly on either side of my mouth.

4. Along those lines, when eating M&Ms or other colored candy, I also have to match the colors. I can have two reds and two greens at the same time, but they have to be balanced.  And by "balanced" I mean that I will sort one of each color to each side of my mouth.  (Man, the crazy is just all over the place in this post. I'm sensing sedatives in my Christmas stocking.)

5. We already know about my bizarre numbers issues.  I fancy myself some sort of misunderstood genius, but really I'm probably just borderline psychopathic. 

6. The last bite of food is the only bite that matters.  I can eat the whole cake, but if someone else takes the last bite, I feel slighted.  And it's not just desserts, but that's the usual point of conflict.  If it's down to the last serving and I am giving it to Rob or the kids I will cut off a tiny bit, hand over the rest, and then eat my bite.  It came out as the last bite in the pan, so even if everyone else is still eating whole platefuls, I won.  If I leave the last bite on my plate for a few minutes to savor it and--heaven forbid--someone takes my plate away I will mourn that single bite for months.  Years even.  Rob and the kids ate the last slices of gluten-free apple pie 5 weeks ago and I'm still a little hurt.

7. I have no issues with feet all day long, but if a foot touches me at night--especially on my foot--I will attempt to bend my knees backwards or just throw myself off the bed to make it stop.  I'll shove Rob's legs across the bed to get his feet away from me.  It's a deal breaker of the highest degree.  If his foot touches my leg I'll squirm away, but --oh, man I've got the willy's just thinking of this -- if his foot touches my foot (*seriously all squicked out here...must power through*) or ankle (**high pitch whining and shuddering**) I have been known to leave the bed.  Now, should my foot happen to touch something, that only registers as a minor annoyance.  Unless, of course, it's another foot.  Then it's like I was dropped in a pit of spiders.  We've mastered the snuggle-with-feet-on-opposite-sides-of-the-bed.  And he only mocks me about once a week.

8. Because I can't stop myself today: Clocks.  I am wholly uncomfortable without a clock in sight.  Some rooms in our house have more than one clock so I can see the time from any seating position.  Every single room has at least one except for one small guest bathroom which I never use.  And they must all be set as close as possible to real time--no fudging it forward a few minutes to trick someone into running faster.  Incidentally, if anyone knows me well they know I'm almost always late for everything and so this obsessive need for clocks is sort of ironic.  And I go through phases of wearing a watch but my mom and I both have some strange issue with watches that seems to wipe them out quickly.  I have never had a digital watch last longer than a month and analog watches tend to lose battery power within 6 months.  I don't think that's normal, but after this I'm starting to wonder what about me is?  

2 comments:

  1. I had forgotten all about that post. I like yours better. That whole last bite thing? We would probably get along. A few months into our marriage Dave asked me if I always left the last bite. I didn't know I did. But then I started paying attention. I do. I cannot eat the last bite or sip of anything. It grosses me out. Even if I cut that last bite into eensy-weensy-teeny-tiny pieces, I have to leave something on the plate.

    Thanks for being crazy too.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I am totally with you on the clock thing. In my kitchen/dining/living room combo, I have five clocks.

    I HATE going to other people's houses who don't have a single clock. To find out the time, they have to get up and go look at the microwave. Drives. Me. Nuts.

    ReplyDelete